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Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • “There’s two people I think Putin pays: Rohrabacher and Trump,” Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.) said to much [laughter] in a recording taken in June 2016. “Swear to God.” According to the recording, verified by the Washington Post, Paul Ryan shut the conversation down and said: “No leaks... This is how we know we’re a real family here.” A McCarthy spokesman told the Post that it was “a failed attempt at humor.” Here’s the transcript. [Washington Post]
  • In a commencement speech delivered to United States Coast Guard Academy graduates, the president spoke, of course, about himself, and how hard things are for him. “Look at the way I have been treated lately, especially by the media,” he complained. “No politician in history, and I say this with great surety, has been treated worse or more unfairly.” Seems like there are a couple of murdered US presidents who might feel differently? Also that guy you said wasn’t born in America? That was kind of unfair? Why am I arguing with this man? [CNN]
  • At the same event, Department of Homeland Security chief John Kelly joked on a hot mic to Trump that he should use his new ceremonial Coast Guard saber “on the press.” Great burn, John! [CNN]
  • The Senate Intelligence Committee invited James Comey to testify publicly, as did the House Oversight Committee. [The New York Times, The Hill]
  • Joe Lieberman is reportedly being considered for the FBI job. [NBC]
  • The Iran Deal seems to be sticking around for now. [New York Times]
  • And the Trump administration has decided to leave the U.S. embassy in Israel where it is. [Bloomberg]
  • Trump wants to cut $10.6 billion from federal education initiatives. [Washington Post]
  • Here’s a video of Tucker Carlson shrieking about the Penn Station bathrooms instead of talking about the president of the United States possibly obstructing justice. [Twitter]
  • If you’re in the mood for even more unbelievably despicable news, here you go. [New York Times]
  • I am breaking out in parts of my face I have never broken out in. Mazel tov to my left cheek!

Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:

This has been Barf Bag.