Why Are People Still Inviting Bill Clinton to Literally Anything?

Here’s a trick: invite Monica Lewinsky to everything you’d invite Bill Clinton to instead!!!

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

• Town & Country invited Monica Lewinsky to its philanthropic summit on Wednesday and then uninvited her when Bill Clinton confirmed that he’d be there! Bill Clinton, a credibly accused serial predator who was also once the president. That’s wild! Just saying. [Huffington Post]
• Wizened turtle and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has hatched a dastardly and ultimately very dangerous plan to confirm all of Trump’s judicial nominees, which the Democrats can do very little about—unless they wrest control of the Senate out from under the clutches of the GOP. Good…luck. [BuzzFeed]
• Aforementioned wizened turtle Mitch McConnell is also super pumped that Don Blankenship lost in West Virginia’s GOP primary. [Politico]
• Here’s a very fun read: The full transcript of a background briefing on Donald Trump’s decision to ruin everyone’s life in a major fucking way by withdrawing from the Iran Deal. [State.gov]
• Concord Management and Consulting LLC, a Russian firm controlled by Russian oligarch Yevgeniy Prigozhin, plead not guilty in one of Robert Mueller’s many criminal investigations alleging that Russian trolls and social media instigators swayed the results of the 2016 election. [Politico]
• Gina Brashears, the woman Trump has picked to oversee food safety for the Department of Agriculture, is a fun lovin’ gal with close ties to Big Ag and testified in court that “pink slime” is totally delish. [Texas Observer]

Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:

This has been Barf Bag.