Image: AP

The President of the United States and the former Vice President of the United States want to fight each other; that much is certain. What remains unclear is when this fight will take place.

“They asked me if I’d like to debate this gentleman, and I said ‘no.’ I said, ‘If we were in high school, I’d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him,’” Joe Biden, a virile 75-year-old, told students at the University of Miami earlier this week, as reported by ABC News. “I’ve been in a lot of locker rooms my whole life,” Biden continued. “I’m a pretty damn good athlete. Any guy that talked that way was usually the fattest, ugliest S.O.B. in the room.”

Donald Trump, a similarly virile 71-year-old, responded on Thursday that he, too, wished to fight:

When will this fight take place? Because we know these statements are not fragile masculine posturing and are instead sincere expressions of the desire, shared by the 71-year-old President of the United States and the 75-year-old former Vice President of the United States, to physically fight one another, we have reached out for comment.


Watch this space for an update.