Photo: AP

As one of his first orders of the new year, the very night he taunted a world leader on Twitter by insinuating simultaneously the possibility of nuclear war and that of his own dick working, President Donald Trump announced that he would produce a “MOST DISHONEST & CORRUPT MEDIA AWARDS OF THE YEAR” on “Monday at 5:00 o’clock” (he tweeted this on a Tuesday, a little over two weeks ago).

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This Wednesday, at 8 p.m., Trump delivered.

Sort of.

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For the first few minutes the link was live it led visitors only to an error message that read, “The site is temporarily offline, we are working to bring it back up. Please try back later.”

Trump—no stranger to owning himself, only to realizing he has done so—has yet to comment on the mechanical failure. But the New York Times, or as Trump calls them “the failing New York Times,” got its cynical, cuss-free chuckles in with the begrudging observation that “The execution was not flawless.”

Less than an hour later, according to the Times, the web page was operational, but still pretty lame. As you’d expect, it contains lots of adverbs in all-caps. Aside from the headline, I wouldn’t characterize it as an awards ceremony of any kind, but rather a list of flourishing presidential grudges, a bit of decorative snark, nothing more. It is—dare I say it—a blog, and not a very good one at that. I’d also like to point out that just above the headline reads the word “blog,” indicating that is the category to which it belongs, but, semantics.

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Where are the golden statues, Mr. President? How very thrifty.