Image: Getty

Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Could someone just give him a nice collection of G.I. Joe’s?

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • For probably the seven thousandth time in the past 24 hours, the president has defied logic, diplomacy, human rights concerns, and the law, this time by suggesting that the military stalk the U.S. border to catch undocumented immigrants. He made this announcement at a meeting with Baltic leaders, who evidently could not hold the president’s interest for long. “Until we can have a wall and proper security, we’re going to be guarding our border with the military,” he said. Despite record-low border crossings, the president is very concerned about what he has phrased on Twitter as “The big Caravan of People from Honduras.” [New York Times]
  • Prez also wants out of Syria NOW, NOW NOW NOW! [Politico]
  • There are certainly a lot of negative stories circulating about EPA administrator Scott Pruitt today! Never fear, my sweaty death king—the president says: “I hope he’s going to be great.” [The Daily Beast, Washington Post, Twitter]
  • Trump is asking a federal judge to order private arbitration in the Stormy Daniels case. [AP]
  • Mueller’s first sentence has been handed down to Dutch lawyer Alex van der Zwaan, who admitted to lying to FBI agents; he will spend 30 days in jail and was fined $20,000. [Politico]
  • A good longread on Saudi prince/Jared Kushner buddy Mohammed bin Salman. [New Yorker]

Here are some tweets the President was allowed to publish:

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