Try to remember, if you can, what it’s like to get scared the old-fashioned way. It’s way more fun, I promise!
Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:
- Donald Trump, a drug-resistant urinary tract infection, on Friday welcomed children of the media to the White House, and the whole thing is unbelievable, even for him.“I cannot believe the media produced such beautiful children,” he said. “How the media did this, I don’t know.” He also offered one child candy, commenting, “You have no weight problems. That’s the good news, right?” Also, let’s remember that this is the same man who sexualized his infant daughter, once told a 14-year-old girls that “In a couple of years, I’ll be dating you.” [NBC Nightly News]
- UK Prime Minister Theresa May has responded to sexual harassment allegations against several politicians in Parliament, saying via a spokesperson that she is taking them “very seriously” and advises those with information to “come forward” so the claims can be investigated. [Business Insider]
- Addressing allegations that he used inappropriate influence to award a $300 million contract to Whitefish, a tiny firm based in his hometown in Montana, to help rebuild Puerto Rico’s electrical grid, Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke released a statement saying that he has “absolutely nothing to do” with the contract. Zinke said he welcomes an investigation by the Office of Inspector General for the Department of Homeland Security. [Ryan Zinke/Twitter]
- Utah Sen. Orrin Hatch might be retiring. [The Atlantic]
- Unsealed documents obtained by the ACLU have revealed that Kansas Secretary of State Kris Kobach, who heads Trump’s bogus voter fraud commission and has been outright hostile towards voting rights, has been devising a plan to suppress voting rights for swaths of Americans [ACLU]
- The US State Department weighed in on Catalan’s vote for independence from Spain, saying, “Catalonia is an integral part of Spain, and the United States supports the Spanish government’s constitutional measures to keep Spain strong and united.” [Business Insider]
Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:
This has been Barf Bag.