Trump Asked Chris Christie to Be His Running Mate Then Changed His Mind

Trump not sharing his giant umbrella with indentured friend Chris Christie. Photo: AP
Trump not sharing his giant umbrella with indentured friend Chris Christie. Photo: AP

Life has been cruel to former Trump manservant Chris Christie of late, but, then again, few merit it more.


Before Donald Trump announced Mike Pence as his running mate, many speculated that the Faustian honor would go to Christie, who had reportedly begun fetching the GOP nominee his McDonald’s and generally seemed to approve of everything he said and did without hesitation.

The almost perverse humbling of Christie continues with an item in the New York Post published Sunday, in which an unnamed source close to the Trump campaign claims that Trump offered the vice presidential slot to Christie, but changed his mind at the last minute.

According to the source, Trump was seduced by Christie’s irresistible sycophancy, but ultimately bended to Republican party leadership and his own advisors, who insisted that Pence would be a better choice for his evangelical appeal. (Note: none of these people appeal to anyone, but in politics we must suspend disbelief, I suppose.)

Trump didn’t want to burn Christie, because the New Jersey governor is something of a tyrant-whisperer. “Trump cares about who’s the most loyal and who kisses his a—the most, not who’s the most qualified and what’s the best political decision,” the source told the Post. “If it was up to him, it would have been Christie.”

A second source told the Post that, “Christie said he thinks he deserves it and he earned it.” I’m not so sure about “earn,” but he absolutely deserved it.

contributing writer, nights



What a shame. This pair would have given us so many quality memes.