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Barf BagWelcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.  

The real national emergency is the fact that I drank nine cans of Diet Dr. Pepper today and still feel alive!

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • Trump is apparently prepared to declare a national emergency to get his border wall. [New York Times]
  • Now is a good time to bone up on what Trump can do if he wishes to—legally, it should be noted—continue to trample on our fraying democratic norms. [The Atlantic]
  • Here are House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s thoughts on Trump’s decision to declare a national emergency so he can build his wall: “You want to talk about an national emergency? Let’s talk about today, the one-year anniversary of another manifestation of the epidemic of gun violence in America.” [Washington Post]
  • And now I’m crying. [Twitter]

  • Another bad man is now officially our new attorney General. [Washington Post]
  • Here’s some goss from former FBI director Andrew McCabe, who is on a book tour (sidenote to former government officials: please stop writing books and please start burning shit!!!): After James Comey was fired, the FBI reportedly talked about ways to remove Trump from office. [New York Magazine]
  • Jared Kushner is still trying. [Politico]
  • Some Republicans in Kansas want to define gay marriage as “parody marriage” as well as create something called “elevated marriage” for the straights and I just died. [USA Today]
  • Some good news: Denver teachers won. [Vox]
  • Some more good news: Amazon announced it’s no longer planning to build a second headquarters in New York City, and thank god for activists who give a shit. [New York Times]
  • Meanwhile, a reminder why Bill de Blasio should not run for president or for any office ever again. [Twitter]

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Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:

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This has been Barf Bag.