The White House Says President Trump Is Just Naturally Carrot Colored

Illustration for article titled The White House Says President Trump Is Just Naturally Carrot Colored
Image: AP

Not unlike that one girl you went to high school with, the Trump White House insists that the president’s orange visage is 100 percent natural. No sun beds, no bronzer, no tanning sprays: just, as one senior White House official said, “good genes.” Yes... “good.”

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The New York Times reports that the president’s carrot-like glow has long been a mystery. (Is it, though?) Old boarding school classmates say that Trump was a fan of tanning bulbs and former Trump aide Omarosa Manigault Newman wrote in her recent tell-all that he still uses a tanning bed. But where’s the alleged tanning bed now?

From the Times:

... According to three people who have spent time in the White House residence, no such bed or spray-tan booth exists in a hidden nook of the residence, a cranny of the East Wing or a closet on Air Force One. Two senior White House officials insisted that no such apparatus exists.

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The Times spoke with a dermatologist who suspects that Trump uses creams or sprays to resemble a weird pumpkin. That the president is using something to make his face look like that is not surprising to anyone who has had the misfortune of looking at a high-definition photo of his face: the area around his eyes is significantly paler than the rest of his skin:

“There have been enough people that have asked me in his orbit,” though not on the president’s behalf, to see what Mr. Trump could do to achieve a more even skin tone, Dr. Alster said. “I have nothing against self-action tanning creams, but I think you need to be careful about how you apply it.”

If Trump enjoys resembling the Cheeto powder that left my fingers orange and stained as a child, so be it. At least he has an ally in his similarly orange wife.

Staff writer, mint chocolate hater.

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DISCUSSION

pootmcfruitcakesjr
PootMcFruitcakesJr

That is not a colour from “natural” tanning, either via a bed or the sun.

It also looks very unlikely to be from a spray tanning booth, because that would come with a professional who would not let that sort of end result, it’s uneven and bizarre. The panda eyes make it look like that - but I think that’s just because he doesn’t apply to his lids, rather than being a goggle shadow.

It’s almost certainly an at-home overnight tanning lotion he slaps on himself, likely something old school and 80s because he doesn’t look like someone to keep up with modern innovation.