Illustration for article titled Ted Cruz Claims That One Person Likes His Beard
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Ted Cruz grew out a beard and the world recoiled in disgust. Now, Cruz claims that his “good friend” (definitely real) who is conveniently abroad knows a rabbi (definitely real) who said that he likes Cruz’s beard:


Cruz claims that the rabbi elaborated on his (definitely real) approval of the beard by saying in a (definitely real) quote, “It gives Cruz a Talmudic & Rabbinic look & presence that will put the fear of the Lord into Israel’s enemies & promote Middle East peace.”


“Perhaps a bit much....” Cruz tweeted. Agreed....

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