Ted Cruz and Donald Trump Have Found an Ideal Location for a Hellmouth to Open Up and Swallow Us All 

Everything is bigger in Texas, except the location of an upcoming Trump rally, which is teeny tiny by Texas standards.

On August 31, Trump tweeted that he’ll be doing a “major rally” with Cruz in October. “I’m picking the biggest stadium in Texas we can find,” Trump wrote, before emphasizing his full endorsement of the man he called a liar with an ugly wife during the 2016 election cycle.

Well, the Dallas News reports that the biggest stadium in Texas that Team Trump could find holds 8,000 people. The rally will be held in Houston’s NRG Arena, which according to the venue’s website, “serves as the primary horse competition facility for the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo.”

For perspective, Texas’s largest stadium—AT&T Stadium in Arlington—holds 100,000 people. And Dallas News noted that when it comes to the Houston area, NRG Stadium—home of the NFL’s Houston Texans—seats about 80,000 people, while the Toyota Center—where the Houston Rockets play—has a capacity of about 18,000.

So why the dinky accommodations? One Trump aide seemed very annoyed by all of these totally reasonable questions.

From Dallas News:

A Trump campaign aide, insisting he not be quoted by name, took issue with questions about whether the rally site falls short of the expectations the president set.

“The suggestion that we didn’t book the largest venue available is erroneous, as we sought other locations for the day that early voting begins in Texas on October 22, but they were not available in Houston,” this aide said by email. “We will try to accommodate as many people as possible and also provide viewing for the overflow crowds that always accompany our rallies.”

Or maybe not enough people want to go to a Cruz rally. I mean, why bother if he’s not going to roll in on a skateboard?

The Trump-Cruz power hour will be held on October 22. Perhaps a hellmouth will open. Can’t wait to find out!