Rick Santorum is, technically, still running for president. It’s understandable if you didn’t recall that fact. Nobody does.

Santorum is polling around two percent, and somehow getting even less attention than the other guys polling around two percent. Two percent is actually an improvement for him, over zero percent back in August.

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And so, in an effort to remind us all he’s out there, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide, Santorum sent out a delightful fundraising letter today, captured by Dave Weigel at the Washington Post. It helpfully equates his “battles” with the “liberal media” to his much more imaginary battles with ISIS:

President Obama is chicken!

Yeah, I said it… because someone had to!

I’ve dealt with the liberal mainstream media for years. They hate us!

But last week’s CNBC debate was a joke and everyone knows it!

Now President Obama mocks us – CONSERVATIVES - for standing up to CNBC? Give me a break! He doesn’t have the guts to appear with Sean Hannity or Mark Levin, let alone take on radical world leaders!

I’ve taken on the ladies of The View. I’ve gone toe-to-toe with Bill Maher. And I’ve debated Rachel Maddow and won.

More importantly, I’ve taken on ISIS and Iran. They know who I am and I know who they are!

You got it, Rick. That’ll do it.


Contact the author at anna.merlan@jezebel.com.

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Rick Santorum speaking at the Iowa State Fair Grounds on Halloween, to what we’re sure was a large and rapt crowd. Photo viaAP Images

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