Now Sean Spicer Wants a Talk Show 

Sean Spicer is just not content to let his brief, humiliating run as White House Press Secretary die quietly. The New York Times reports that he’s developing a talk show, which is funny in that painful way it’s funny when a hated boss gets wasted at the company holiday party and tries to karaoke Back That Ass Up. You just want to excuse yourself to the bathroom until it’s over.

The Times obtained a pitch sheet for the show, tentatively titled Sean Spicer’s Common Ground. Vulture seems sure that Spicer did not write this pitch on a cocktail napkin at an airport bar; I have no idea why they think that. From the Times:

A pitch sheet for the show’s pilot, obtained by The New York Times, describes Mr. Spicer hosting “some of the most interesting and thoughtful public figures for a drink and some lite conversation at a local pub or cafe.”

“The relaxed atmosphere is an ideal setting for Sean to get to know his guests as they discuss everything from the media to marriage,” the pitch continues. “They might even tangle over the merits of making your bed or the value of a great point guard.”

Sean Spicer wants to chat with famous people about the merits of top sheets while drinking, you say? No. The project has yet to find a network, but the pilot is being co-produced by Debmar-Mercury, which is also behind The Wendy Williams Show and Family Feud. It would feature one guest per episode, and would (very, very aspirationally) look like a combination of Washington Week and Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee, presumably without any of the intelligence or humor.

Don’t forget, though, that Spicer is not a lovable scamp absolved of all past wrongdoing because he was able to laugh at himself at the Emmy’s that one time. He is a simpering arriviste who’s trying to leverage the fame he acquired spinning breathtaking lies and hateful rhetoric for his boss into something less stressful and more lucrative. Don’t let him do it. Make him crawl back into the bushes where he belongs.