Michael Cohen Reportedly Paid Someone to Create a Fake Twitter Account Calling Him Hot and Smart 

It is possible that you have grown numb to the many ways that the Trump presidential campaign was a money spigot for the very worst kind of people with the very worst kind of political instincts, but please do not look away. Instead, look toward the Wall Street Journal, which on Thursday reported that Michael Cohen, President Trump’s former lawyer who last month was sentenced to three years in prison for a series of charges related to tax fraud and false statements, apparently paid someone connected to the campaign to create a Twitter account dedicated to calling him hot.

What a world:

During the presidential race, Mr. Cohen also asked Mr. Gauger to create a Twitter account called @WomenForCohen. The account, created in May 2016 and run by a female friend of Mr. Gauger, described Mr. Cohen as a “sex symbol,” praised his looks and character, and promoted his appearances and statements boosting Mr. Trump’s candidacy.

John Gauger, who owns a technology company called RedFinch and is also the chief information officer at Liberty University, was reportedly enlisted by Cohen to provide “tech services” to the campaign that included “trying unsuccessfully to manipulate two online polls in Mr. Trump’s favor.” And the creation of @WomenForCohen, of course.

The account bio describes @WomenForCohen as created by “Women who love and support Michael Cohen. Strong, pit bull, sex symbol, no nonsense, business oriented, and ready to make a difference!”

It has been dormant since December 2016, but an average tweet looked something like:

Or:

And:

Also:

And for some reason this, which was tweeted at no one:

For these services, according to the Wall Street Journal, Gauger was paid with “a blue Walmart bag containing between $12,000 and $13,000 in cash and, randomly, a boxing glove that Mr. Cohen said had been worn by a Brazilian mixed martial arts fighter, Mr. Gauger said.”

Cohen denied this, saying: “All monies paid to Mr. Gauger were by check.” But isn’t he so handsome?