Michael Bloomberg Is Picking Up the Climate Change Slack & Trump Is Gonna Be So Mad

Paris Mayor Anne Hidalgo, Michael Bloomberg, and President Emmanuel Macrón meet in Paris on Friday, June 2.
Paris Mayor Anne Hidalgo, Michael Bloomberg, and President Emmanuel Macrón meet in Paris on Friday, June 2.

After Donald Trump, a quarter-finished Jeff Koons sculpture of a peanut’s ballsac, announced his plans to withdraw from/“renegotiate” the Paris Climate Accord, Twitter saw a number of CEOs condemn the move and/or withdraw from Trump’s council in protest. But the likes of Elon Musk, Tim Cook, and GE CEO Jeff Immelt are thus far falling short compared to their billionaire peer, former New York mayor-cum-climate change activist Michael Bloomberg, who has promised to donate $15 million to the UN convoy on climate change to offset losses from US withdrawal.


Not only that, Bloomberg has the capital to do what we all wish we could: this dude flew to Paris to ensure President Macron and Paris Mayor Anne Hidalgo that, despite the truly appalling decision of the goiter in the White House, the United States vows to nevertheless uphold our end of the agreement.

Pretty weird that the most presidential act since Obama left the White House was executed by the guy who essentially turned New York City into sea of condos, but I guess when you’re the tenth wealthiest person on Earth you have a vested interest in protecting that Earth! That said, despite his accommodations to the rich, in his three terms he did enact initiatives that helped make NYC the 14th greenest city in the US as of 2016, a remarkable feat for the most populated city in the country, and in the wake of Hurricane Sandy he led the effort to prepare the city for climate change.

Bloomberg’s motivations are surely not entirely altruistic; he toyed with running for President in 2016, and it’s thought that he might actually launch a run in 2020. Throughout the 2016 election season, when Bloomberg was considering a run, his former “friendship” with Trump dissolved into a rivalry and Trump started insulting his height (?) in the exact way a terribly insecure third-grade bully might. Because Trump is a petty fucking loser who sucks and is dumb.

And so, here is Bloomberg, in what is hopefully his first act as our shadow president, here to try and right the wrong of a fellow New Yorker whose megalomania is more dangerous by the day. What kind of world is this that I’m psyched that Michael Bloomberg is inserting himself into a political situation!


It gives me extra satisfaction that Bloomberg is wealthier than Trump, because I know that must drive Trump nuts.