How was your week? Doing anything exciting this weekend?

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • If she really was a Russian spy, Maria Butina wasn’t very good at it: Sources say she would reveal her covert profession when she was drunk, which, in all honestly, I’m pretty sure I would do too. [CNN]
  • A visit from members of the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia’s entourage gave the Trump International Hotel in Manhattan a 13 percent boost in revenue in this year’s first quarter. Revenue had been on the decline for the last two years—hmm, I wonder why? [Washington Post]
  • In response to the U.S. threatening to raise a tariff on $200 billion Chinese goods from 10 percent to 25 percent, China released a statement on Friday saying it could raise a 5 percent tariff on $60 billion U.S. goods to 25 percent. Happy trade war, I guess? [Bloomberg]
  • The NRA says that losing its insurance coverage threatens its day-to-day operations and that it may soon be “unable to exist,” which I’d be fine with. [Rolling Stone]
  • Remember when Trump called Mexican immigrants rapists? On Thursday night, he said his version of the story is “peanuts” compared to truth. [The Hill]
  • Paulette Jordan is the 38-year-old Democratic candidate for governor of Idaho who’s won the endorsement of Planned Parenthood. She’s also a gun-owner, hunts as a hobby, and rides horses. A state legislator since 2014, Jordan tells CNN that she thinks she can wrangle votes from Republicans, and if she wins the race, she’ll be the first woman and first Native American to ever take the office. [CNN]
  • For years, the F.D.A. failed to stem the widespread distribution of potent fetanyl drugs meant for cancer patients. [New York Times]

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Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish today:

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This has been Barf Bag.

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