God Saved Ben and Candy Carson from a Deadly Car Accident, Reports Candy Carson

Ben Carson has a difficult relationship with the truth. He gets his facts a bit confused on a regular basis. At times, he misspeaks. Oh, hell, Ben Carson flat out lies all the time, and it looks like his wife Candy has adopted that same trait.

In an interview with Bloomberg, the artist formerly known as Lacena provided readers with a big bag of inane anecdotes and metaphors while giving a behind the scenes look into the recording of her upcoming Christmas album. (The Carsons are basically just conservative, Syrian orphan -hating Jay and Bey!)

Among Candy’s many anecdotes (including one about how her son used to “just hit stuff” with his car) is a tale about God saving Ben and Candy from a car crash. While students at Yale, the two were driving back from a recruiting trip when the usually alert (really?) Carson was unable to keep his eyes open:

On their 10-hour drive back to campus, Ben Carson fell asleep at the wheel while she was asleep in the front passenger seat. “By all laws of physics, we should have crashed, but the car stopped by itself,” she said. “And we’re looking at each other like, ‘Thank God.’”

Well, yes, except that the laws of physics are real laws that don’t just sort of randomly stop working.

In a video interview, Candy went into more details about the crash that God Himself personally spent his time saving them from, claiming among other things that they had been moving at 90 miles per hour:

“To my recollection, the car went around in a circle like a a small Indy 500 track. Just went around the circle a few times. Stopped by itself—Ben says he didn’t touch the brakes—stopped by itself, heading in the right direction in the right lane.”

Hm.

Candy then added that that’s when she and Ben knew that God had a purpose for their lives. So thanks, God. And thank you, Candy, for this incredibly believable story.