Donald Trump Fears the Jockstrap

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Donald Trump Fears the Jockstrap
Image:Getty

Who doesn’t fear a jockstrap, though, really?

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • “Jockstrap” is a naughty word in Trump world, apparently. During a notably unhinged rant against House Intelligence Committee head Adam Schiff, Trump wanted to say that Schiff wasn’t fit to carry Secretary of State Mike Pompeo’s jockstrap. Instead, he censored himself, saying, “You know, there’s an expression: He couldn’t carry his blank strap. I won’t say it, because they’ll say it was so terrible to say.” Hm, he won’t say jockstrap, but he has no qualms with writing the word “bullshit” on Twitter. Got it! [Vanity Fair]
  • Imagine explaining Nickleback to Donald Trump:
  • Senate Democrats are trying to get the NRA’s tax exempt status revoked. [NBC News]
  • Rudy Giuliani will sue the fucking swamp (jaw suit):
  • Impeachment fever is spreading, baby! A new poll shows that for the first time ever, more voters support removing President Trump from office than oppose. [Politico]
  • Surprise: You can get away with gerrymandering really easily when you don’t use the word gerrymander! Who would have thought? [Slate]
  • Trump hotel scam? Crime season is getting better and better. [Politico]
  • An immigrant from Cameroon has died in ICE custody. [Buzzfeed News]

Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:

This has been Barf Bag.

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