A Simple Trick to Help You Tell the Difference Between Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump

Donald Trump, Jr., and Eric Trump are two different people. That much is clear. But which one is which? Sometimes, for me, it is hard to tell.

Because, you see, I suffer from male face blindness, which means I sometimes confuse individual men with one another because it is hard for me to remember which man is which. When I walk into the kitchen and see one of my roommates at the fridge, I gasp as if he’s a stranger. When I peep inside a sports bar, I see a faceless sea of contoured beards. When I watch Game of Thrones, I need a male companion beside me to tell me what’s happening once Daenerys and Sansa and Cersei leave the scene. “Is that Rickard Karstark?” I ask. “No,” he says. “That’s Wyman Manderly.” “Thanks, Matt,” I tell him. “It’s Craig,” he mumbles back.

This problem rears its indistinguishable head every time I read about Donald Trump’s eldest sons: Donald Trump, Jr., and Eric Trump. I know that one has brown hair and the other is blond. I know that they are both awful but that one is more douchey and the other one’s just like regular rich guy bad. Still, I find myself Googling them over and over and over and over again because I just can’t remember which one is which.

This changes today, for I have found a way to remember the difference between the president’s pair of adult men: Donald Trump Jr., looks like a character from Street Sharks, a Ninja Turtles knockoff from the mid ‘90s about sharkmen vigilantes, while Eric Trump just looks like a regular shark.

Street Shark

Regular Shark

Street Shark

Regular Shark

See? What did I tell you? And it’s easy to remember, too, because Donny does look like a Street Shark, but Eric is Er-eal shark. See? Easy. Glad we could work this out.