A Roundtable Weenie Roast, Plus Some Deep Speculation About Rand Paul

Image via Getty.
Image via Getty.

Grab a seat around the roaring campfire of Big Time Dicks and a big stick, because this week on the podcast we’re roasting a record number of weenies that are fucking up everyone’s good time.

This week, Jezebel staff writer Ellie Shechet, senior reporter Anna Merlan, and I discuss Omarosa Manigault’s White House wedding-party photoshoot (did you forget she worked in the White House? We sort of did!) and Steve Bannon’s obsession with himself, but not without first touching on this moment in our nation’s history, which would make the Real Housewives of most regions proud:


Later in the episode we catch up on the allegations against Alabama Senate candidate Roy Moore. An Alabama woman claims that Moore sexually assaulted her when she was a teenager, and three other women have come forward claiming that he “pursued” them romantically when they were also teenagers.

All this gets us depressed, so we switch gears to unravel the mystery that keeps getting weirder and weirder: Rand Paul’s fight with his neighbor, which has left them with a bunch of broken ribs and an untold number of broken hearts. Was it a fight over landscaping? Just two bored old dudes? A crime of passion? We make what we’re sure you’ll agree is a convincing case for the latter.

Big Time Dicks can be found on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify, Google Play, iHeart Radio, and on the NPR One app.

Want to tell us about a Big Time Dick in your life? Send us a voice note to BigTimeDicks@jezebel.com. Also, please rate and subscribe to the podcast, and recommend it to your friends, to make sure others are able to get their weekly dose of dick. If you need an antidote to this dark (but explained in a fun, relatable way) subject matter, check out our sister pop culture podcast DirtCast.

Kelly Stout is Jezebel's features editor.


Doyenne Chambers

Rand was having casual, no-strings-attached sex with the neighbor, but the neighbor had to go and catch feelings like some sort of snowflake libtard. Rand told him “nah I’m good” and then Rand got his ribs rearranged.