President Trump's Parenting Style—Revealed!

Illustration for article titled President Trump's Parenting Style—Revealed!
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President Trump doesn’t like vaping—and he hopes to impart this deeply held value to his very tall teenage son, Barron. (Melania’s son?) His preferred method of encouraging Barron away from the sins of vaping is, frankly, inspiring.


Last week, in the wake of announcing that his administration plans to ban the sale of flavored e-cigarettes, a reporter asked Trump what he and Melania have told Barron about vaping. Trump said, “We haven’t told him anything except, ‘Don’t vape. Don’t vape.’ We don’t like vaping. I don’t like vaping.”

This, of course, is a tried and true method that assures teenagers never do anything risky—particularly mango vape pods. Best of luck to everyone involved!

Staff writer, mint chocolate hater.


This reminds me if a teacher I had in high school. She was in her 70s, tiny, and mean. But before class she would exasperatedly sigh and offer the class random life advice such as:

(*loud sigh followed by closing eyes and rubbing the bridge of her nose beneath her glasses*)

“Young people. Don’t murder.”

And then she would start class.