Screenshot via YouTube/Fox News

Wayne Allyn Root is many things: a conservative media personality, an enthusiastic promoter of the idea that Barack Obama is a socialist puppet of the devil, and now, as is the way of the Universe, a big, big fan of Donald Trump. He is also gently deluding himself (and us all), telling a radio host that Trump couldn’t have groped anyone because he’s “one of the handsomest billionaires who ever lived.” Hmm.

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Right Wing Watch has been covering Root’s activities for a long time: he ran for president as a Libertarian back in 2008, and promotes a contorted and very stupid conspiracy theory that President Obama spent his time at Columbia University learning how to “destroy capitalism.” They noted back in December that he was emceeing a Trump rally in his home state of Nevada.

It was a match made in a hellish self-tanning booth built for two, and their love affair has picked up speed even as many Republicans quietly slink away from Trump in Pussygate’s wake. Root wrote an op-ed for Fox News Monday saying Trump will “win big” despite every poll that says he won’t. Root specifically points to the “crazed fans” at Trump rallies, which doesn’t sound as positive as he thinks it does.

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Meanwhile, back in the less-traveled sectors of the media where he usually hangs out, Root is also claiming that Donald Trump is a very handsome man who was literally sent by God. In an appearance also noted by Right Wing Watch, Root went on Joe Messina’s radio show The Right Side, where he said “I don’t believe any of it anyway” and “It’s all a lie,” re: the groping. Let’s just see this full thing in its addled glory, emphasis added:

“If you’re a Christian, you just can’t spend your life worrying about the words of Donald Trump from 11 years ago,” Root said, “or what women he groped 30 years ago. I don’t believe any of it anyway. I believe Donald Trump is one of the handsomest billionaires that’s ever lived; I don’t think he ever had to grope a single woman ever. I think they threw themselves at him, so it’s all a lie.”

“The man isn’t a perfect Christian,” Root admitted, but he is “the perfect guy sent from God and from central casting to be the vicious guy we needed to save America, save capitalism, fight the Clinton crime cartel and save Christianity from these vicious, vicious people. They’re terrible, dirty people and a nice guy could have never won this war. Only a dirty player could win the war, so I think Donald’s the perfect guy, sent by God to fill the perfect role and save us all.”

In fairness, Root has been using some version of the “sent by God” line for at least seven months, including on Fox News.

When he’s not looking at Donald Trump with cartoon heart-eyes, Root is busy tweeting about “black thugs” and making addled claims that he will pay the current president to leave the United States.

Another flawless Trump surrogate, perhaps himself sent by the Lord.