After hearing a proposal by North Carolina delegate Mary Frances Forrester, a subcommittee of Republicans has agreed to label pornography as a “public health crisis” in the draft party platform that will be ratified next week at the Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

According to CNN, the provision states:

“The internet must not become a safe haven for predators. Pornography, with its harmful effects, especially on children, has become a public health crisis that is destroying the life of millions.”

We’ve yet to see the statistics demonstrating that millions of lives have been destroyed by porn (unless we’re counting wasted jizz—are we counting wasted jizz, Mary?)—but we’ve certainly seen the stats on lives destroyed by, say, gun violence, which I’m sure the GOP will address in their own thoughtful and—no? Never mind—we’re still talking about porn!

The provision continues:

We encourage states to continue to fight this public menace and pledge our commitment to children’s safety and well-being. We applaud the social networking sites that bar sex offenders from participation. We urge energetic prosecution of child pornography which closely linked to human trafficking.”

The GOP seems to be conflating a lot of issues here, what with their linking of child pornography (an unequivocally bad and illegal thing) with legal pornography made by and involving consenting adults. Then again, this is the same party that commonly associates marriage between two people of the same sex with bestiality and pedophilia, so we shouldn’t be surprised at their blurring of lines and unwieldy imaginations.

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Or, hey, maybe the Republicans are right and pornography really is a national health crisis. They certainly know best, after all.


Images via Hustler.