Would you like to watch two middle-aged men—one, a limp, anthropomorphic scarf; the other, a tin-haired gargoyle —jerk each other off in front of a camera for precisely one minute? Well!
Bono and “Vice President”“Mike Pence” met briefly at the Munich Security Conference on Saturday, at which the latter had just finished speaking. “It just feels so fresh,” Bono is saying as the camera starts rolling. There’s an awkward pause, and Pence tugs at the lapel of his jacket. Bono does not then take the opportunity to excoriate Pence on his hellacious views on abortion, guns, immigration or the environment. Nor does he issue any stern words to take back to his Orange Master.
Instead, Bono used his face time with Mike Pence, “the second busiest man in America,” to praise him for supporting the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR) way back in 2003. He managed to do that, with a straight face, without bringing up the fact that during his time as governor, Pence enabled the worst HIV outbreak in Indiana’s history. At its height, the state was facing 20 new cases of the virus each week, while Pence sat back and dithered about the morality of needle exchanges.
“Twice on the House floor you defended that. That’s how we know you, and we really appreciate that,” Bono said quietly, perhaps in hopes the mic wouldn’t pick up his unctuousness.
“It was an extraordinary historic accomplishment and you played a leading role in carrying it forward,” Pence beamed back.