Happy 63rd birthday—that’s a little over four quinces—to Señor Jeb Bush, may your mamá rent you and Columba a bitchin’ limo with neon runners and, shit, because I feel sorry for you lately, tons of MDMA. !FELIZ CUMPLEAÑOS, HE’ BOOSH!


Contact the author at julianne@jezebel.com.

Advertisement

Images via Getty.