Donald Trump is still breathing, so of course he is engaged in yet another petty argument that only bolsters the case that he’s an animatronic buffoon in an expensive suit and oversized veneers.
This time, he’s going against Samuel L. Jackson. Now, to be fair, it was Jackson who threw the first punch in this particular dudefight, but you can’t reasonably blame him for that. Somehow Donald Trump came up during an interview in the January issue of United’s in-flight magazine, Rhapsody, of all places.
Although he says the two were never “buddies,” Jackson recalls that they’ve played golf together. When asked who was the better golfer, Jackson said (via Page Six): “Oh, I am, for sure. I don’t cheat.”
OHHHH SNAP. Does it surprise anyone to learn that Donald Trump cheats at golf? He’s more or less cheated his way to fame and fortune, and on his first wife. What’s a game of golf?
Apparently Donald Trump cheating at golf is already A Thing. The Washington Post even tracked down a substantial list of people who confirmed that yes, he constantly cheats at golf because the security of his manhood is entirely dependent upon winning a leisurely recreation involving tiny white balls.
Jackson also claims that Donald Trump’s golf club sent him a bill for a membership that he never signed up for, perhaps in an attempt to cheat him out of money as well:
“But it’s funny — last week or so, I actually got a bill from Trump National Golf Club,” he added. “And I haven’t been there in four or five years, so I had my assistant call. They said it was for membership dues. And I said, ‘I’m not a member,’ and they said, ‘Yeah, you are — you have a member number.’ Apparently he’d made me a member of one of his golf clubs, and I didn’t even know it!”
In his trademark move, Donald Trump tweeted his response to Jackson’s comments while, I assume, the head of his communications team tended to a six-month-long migraine:
Let’s just assume that these two definitely did play golf—two incredibly rich and famous men playing golf together is highly plausible occurrence, after all. And why would Samuel L. Jackson make that up?
Personally, I don’t find Jackson’s commercial appearances to be particularly intrusive, but commercials are generally annoying. But come on, not a fan? It’s statistically impossible not to be a fan of something Samuel L. Jackson has done. For every four movies released, Samuel L. Jackson is in one of them. (Don’t check my math on that.)
Donald Trump is the loser here, but kudos to him for not reverting to what seems like the only tool in his arsenal: calling someone else a loser.
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Images via Getty.