Today, another load of Clinton emails were wet-heaved onto the internet. Most of them are banal. Many of them are nonsensical without context. And at least one of the trove of Hillary emails reads like the grocery lists of a mad scientist dabbling in mad diplomacy. It confuses and delights me.

Here’s an email the former Secretary of State sent her special assistant Lauren C. Jiloty on October 8, 2010. It appears to be a to-do list, or some jotted down notes; possibly mnemonics. Go ahead and read it and tell me what you think it means. I’m mesmerized. I am at a loss. I feel like I am about to cry what my coworker Ellie calls Math Tears.

Another email, sent to Jiloty on September 15, 2009, is similarly puzzling, simply reading:

Cook stoves

Export Control

Visa reform—categories that need to be vetted.

Are Hillary Clinton’s to-do lists any more wacky sounding than the to-do lists of a layperson like you or me? Hard to say; the list of jotted down notes about a foot from my right hand reads “QUEER TRANSFEMININE,” “Gowanus Wild” and “batteries.” Who am I to judge?


Contact the author at erin@jezebel.com.