Picture this but instead of walking, he’s dancing, and instead of being at the White House, he’s in a ballroom. Image via Getty.

If you are one of the millions of Americans who watch ABC’s unabashedly campy Dancing With the Stars—or one of the hundreds who read my recaps of it—you’ll know that the show is something like a purgatory for has-beens hoping for a comeback, and celebrities on the way down. Like purgatory, it exists largely outside the moral binary, allowing for the honorable and wretched to desecrate the Argentine tango side by side in front of the country’s most forgiving viewers.

That’s why when I read the Page Six report that DWTS is trying to court former Press Secretary and modern day court jester Sean Spicer, I nearly plotzed. It’s a match made in ratings heaven, a breathtaking confluence of greed and shamelessness. Plus, if I get five Trump administration officials on DWTS in a row, I win my personal game of BINGO.

From Page Six:

Spicer, who announced his resignation Friday, was seen coming out of high-level meetings at ABC, NBC, CBS and Fox News in Manhattan, according to sources. A source told us some news execs “made the full-court press” as they competed to woo the high-profile spokesman — who brought in solid ratings and plenty of late-night fodder — while others “just kicked the tires.”...

But a TV insider confirmed to Page Six that the dancing competition show has indeed reached out to the Beltway insider. “That has legs,” the source said.

Where do you go when you’ve just finished up a world-renowned run as the daffily incompetent face of an evil regime? Not to MSNBC or Fox News or, god forbid, Cheddar. Spicer has already outgrown those networks, both in orangeness and believability. If God could talk and was interested in good (not lazy) plot development, she would certainly say, “To the Dancing With the Stars ballroom.”

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When Page Six spoke with Spicer on the phone on Wednesday, he said, “I have no comment.”

Of course he doesn’t :).